Tuesday, 19 May 2015

What Goes Up Must Come Down

As we all already know - or maybe not of you haven't read this post - my first board-timetabled exam didn't go all that well. However, there is a but...

In what appeared to be a dramatic turn of events, toady's unit 1 physics exam was going so very well I almost couldn't believe it. Oh it was going so well. So well in fact that I wanted to thank the monsters at AQA for on this rare occasion going easy on us - maybe in pity of our assured dire EMPA performances.

It was going so well,..

That is, it was going oh so very well until I realised with utter despair that the exam ended at 10:15, rather than 10:30 as had been the case for maths, and as advertised for the applied science paper also being sat in the same room as ours. It felt as though I was plummeting down the stairs - as I had done earlier this morning - all over again -- reliving the excruciating moment for an eternity. Just take a moment to imagine the horror on my face as the damned revelation set in.

I was sitting right on full UMS and then suddenly flew into a frenzied state as I tried to cling on to a decent raw mark, like I tried to cling to the stair rail that wasn't ever there. What I had thought was seventeen minutes to complete ten mark's worth of questions was in fact a sorry two. That's a bloody seventh of the paper! IN TWO MINUTES!!

Internal resistance of a f*cking potato. A bloody potato! Who gives a damn? They may well taste good boiled, baked, roasted, and mashed, certainly not forgetting deep-fat-fried, but I for one really don't care about how well they oppose the flow of charge. I spent an absolute age on that question, all because I forgot to convert those sly milliamps before making a gradient calculation. Classic!

If having only 120 seconds to complete three further resistance/resistivity questions wasn't bad enough, me being me I only went and deleted the entire screen of bloody workings on my all-singing, all-dancing, calculator display, just as we were made to put our pens down, didn't it?! It's far from being funny, but I will be the first to admit that it does make for good writing material. This has actually been surprisingly enjoyable!

I've been saving the title of this post for quite a while, which reminds me of another fall I had last summer. The idiotic accident involved a certain younger brother, a locked door and and old, brittle, plastic water butt. If you can see where this is going, I'm sure you'll agree that it's not particularly pleasant.

All I'll say is that someone thought it would be funny to lock the other out of the house in only their underwear - having spent the entire day revising in the garden - *hmm, I wonder who that could be...?* just as they needed to use the bathroom. Being the physicist that I like to think I am, it looked as though I'd finally be able to put that old water butt to good use in aiding me to climb onto the roof, where an upstairs window remained slightly ajar.

There was just one problem. I didn't account for all those extra calories I'd failed to burn off from Easter, plus it was only this year that we studied the breaking stress of brittle materials in any proper detail. And so, with that, my beautifully formulated plan soon became history, shattering from beneath me just as the makeshift ledge had done.

I don't think I ever did make it to the toilet...

Excuse my French. I'm not quite sure what came over me!


  1. Wow! That sounds like a crap day! At tleast you can laugh at yourself though!

  2. Oh wow, that totally sounds like a horrible day. I can't even imagine. I love that you can laugh at it though for sure. I know I would probably of had a mini melt down for sure. It will get better for sure!

  3. Not your best day but it seems like you learned from it!

  4. Hope you have better days ahead.

  5. Hopefully things are looking up now!

  6. Sorry to hear you had a bad day, but remember you have to go through the bad to get to the good. Here's hoping you have better days from here on out!

  7. Yikes! When I'm having a crappy day, sometimes I have to remind myself that it can only get better from here :)

  8. It's the ability to laugh or at least harness it for great writing material that makes life worth living.

  9. Terrible day - hope things go better in the future.

  10. Oh no! It's good that you can laugh at yourself now...but glad that day is over, too! ;)

  11. But these kind of days make the best stories!


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